Tuesday, September 7, 2010

It's Different This Time...

I don't expect anybody else to understand my passion for dogs and rescue.  When 'it' found me, it gobbled me up whole and it will never spit me out.  And if it did, I would never be whole again.

But I struggle with it because nobody else understands.  It's most difficult being in love with a man who just doesn't get it either.  Red isn't a dog person, which is unfortunate because it's a constant source of tension between us. 

When I adopted my dogs, there was something there.  There was a feeling about the dog that brought about an understanding that that dog was to be mine.  It's a specific emotion, and I've never had it for any dog other than my own.  Jake, Frankie and Kirby.  Maggie is Red's dog... I didnt have a feeling about her for me.  I had a feeling about her for Red though.  I knew the day they met that she was his.  Yeah, we went through 2 more adoptions and returns before Red finally realized it for himself. 
Jake is my soul. He's the driving force behind the strength of my passion for rescue. He is the reason that I took the path that brought me to where I am today. Without him, I fear where I might be.













Frankie is my heart.  She sprouted something in my heart that is so huge that is sometimes overwhelms. She makes me laugh, she makes me cry.  She's amazing. And she has eyes only for me.  Non-dog people just dont understand the beautiful power in that.

Kirby is my love.  He's a clown and a fool.  He keeps me grounded and slows me down when I push my life too quickly.  And he constantly reminds me of why I love dogs in the first place.  Kirby will not be pushed, and thats what makes me a better dog owner.

This past weekend, Kirby, Frankie and I travelled south to Napervilla, IL for a frisbee comp.  We brought back with us 5 Aussies who were facing death.  Konrad, Babaloo, Finn, Aubrey....

And Smoke.
Smoke is my light.  And he should be mine.  The minute Smokey stepped off the transport on Saturday and I wrapped my arms around him, he was mine.  He didnt leave my side all weekend.  We were bonded instantly.  And last night when I had to say goodbye to him and send him with his foster mom, it was like the light went out.  I've been sad since he left me. I have tears in my eyes when I see the pictures I took of him. 

Smoke is meant to be mine.  I know it.  He knows it.  It breaks my heart that I cannot have him simply because my love isn't a dog person.  I feel blue.

Its so dark without my Smokey Boy.

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