My Lab Jake..

I have a yellow lab mix named Jake.

And don't think I didn't hear all of you Musings followers slapping your foreheads and saying 'Doy'.

Anyways... As I was saying. I have a yellow lab mix named Jake.



Jake and I have been around the block together. He's the love of my life. He has been with me since before Red even came into the picture. He and I have been through it all. Fleas, moving, heartache, joy.. He's been by my side for so many years now. I don't remember life without him.
My lab is quickly aging on me. It breaks my heart everyday to see him get grayer in the face. To amble along instead of walk. He still has a lot of life left in him. But I am seeing the changes more and more these days. And recently, there has been a change in my old man. It's like he isnt here anymore.

When I got him, he was a stray. So we, the vet and I, took a random crack at guessing his age. I think we guessed too low. And I always thought so, but I never wanted to admit it. But now that he's a 'senior' canine, I am being forced to admit that my years with my lab are getting numbered.
I fear that this dog rescue is taking it's toll on him. And the more I think about it and the more I watch him, you can bet your ass that I would give up my rescue, even temporarily, if it would mean I could have my dog back.

I can't quite put my finger on what it is. Maybe he's upset that I brought the Aussie into our home. Maybe he doesn't want all of these dogs coming and going. I mean, that has to be hard on a dog, right? The pack is continually changing, and he's always been at or near the bottom.
When I put everybody else away and Red is gone, it's just Jake and I. And when it's just the two of us, my labby boy shines through. The spunky, playful dog comes back out of his shell. I miss my dog, and I cherish these moments.



His eyes are getting a touch of fog in them. His stride is a little bit hitched. His face is graying...

Stop graying, Jake. I don't like it.


If we go by the age that we aged him at when I got him, he would be about 7 years old now. But sadly, I believe we are off. I think he's at least 8, maybe more. But it doesnt matter to me his age. Or his looks. He will stay with me for the remainder of his life. And if God grants us another 5 years together, I will rejoice. I don't have to prepare myself for anything just yet. My labby boy is here with me tonight, and I will give thanks. And I will continue to give thanks for the rest of my life to be lucky enough to have been owned by a dog like Jake.

Ice, Snow, Sleet, Wind, Fog, Lightening & Thunder

All in one day. No no, all in one hour. Sick, right?
I drove into work today. It was a fine morning. The office was buzzing with concerns over the storm, which seemed to be missing us.
Oh, but we were wrong. So wrong. It was too late by the time I started out, leaving work early and heading home.
I made the mistake of driving through town first. Totally a dumb idea. People still haven't learned to drive in whiteout conditions, even though we have been battling through it for the part 4 months.
Made it to the highway that would take me home. Started with whiteout, moved onto slushy snow, onto sleet and ice, back to snow, back to a mix. My windshield wipers froze. Then my windshield froze. It's not like I could see the road with a cleared window, so it really didnt matter that I couldnt see through it. I had to sing to remind myself to keep breathing. Then all of a sudden my blurry, white snow bubble turned a magnificent shade of purple. Then the roaring thunder followed.
I came to a stretch of road crossing a long bridge, and for a moment it was so beautiful. Maybe it was fear that made it so pretty to me. But then I snapped back out of it with a second snap of lightening.

Winter's back. Again.



Only a few more weeks for you to reign supreme, Ole Man Winter. Then Spring is kicking your butt out of here.

Furious. Enraged.

Over the stupidest thing. But it's true.
I drive into work this morning, minding my own business. My entire drive is on highways/freeways. So when I come to a stretch of road where there are vehicles merging onto the highway, I am a curtious driver and I move myself over.
And what do I get in return for my kindness? A jack ass in the box. Or rather, a jack ass in an ugly black Jeep. And don't think I don't know who you are, pal.
I move on over and let him on. And since he's still going slow, I speed up to pass. And what does he do? He punches the gas and stays right next to me. All the way to the damn on ramp to the freeway. Never before have I let go such a string of obscenities in a single sentence. I was angry. I was furious. I was completely enraged. And 5 minutes later when I finally pulled into my parking spot at work, I was still shaking from my anger. Are people really that bored these days that they feel it necessary to cause potential for an auto accident? I mean really?
But you know what? Thanks for letting me vent, folks. I feel great now. We have more snow coming! Woo! Maybe it will make for a half work day. Maybe. Just maybe.
Then I can take some more photos. And share them with you. And get back to my normal blogging strategies. Yeah. That sounds nice.

I'm an idiot

Yeah, I can be an idiot. And I have been for nearly the entire duration of this particular matter at hand, which extends back for more than half of my life. I am not going to go into it really. It's a really long story. It's an interesting story, but it's long. And maybe I'll get around to telling it eventually. It effects my life pretty strongly, so I really should share it here. But now is not the time.
Last night I spoke to somebody who means very much to me. I have not heard his voice in many years, nor have I seen his face in even more years.
For some very interesting but unknown reasons, whenever we speak I revert back to a very young version of myself. It's weird. I met him when I was like 13yo, which could be why. I learned a lot from him. We worked together, we drove around a lot together, we talked a lot. He is one of the people who got me through my high school years. Eventually we.. 'saw' each other kind of casually. But mostly he was just a good, close friend who I could always count on.
He 'text messaged' me last night. It wasnt random, there was a purpose for his contact. I have not talked to him in so long. I ended up having to call him, as text messaging is just... There was too much to say to text it. I nearly had to swig a beer just to chill out. But I didnt. I nearly hyperventalated everytime I was about to hit the 'talk' button on my cell. But I didnt. And when he answered the phone in that sweet, friendly, familiar voice that I loved so much... I was shocked to learn that I no longer became a stupid, brainless girl.
That was the only part that made me happy though. Mostly I was just sad. Sad because I had squashed his many attempts for real friendship in the past years.
Our conversation, though it only lasted 5 minutes, was pleasant. We'll never be the friends that we could have been. It's too late for that. I'm sad that I pushed such a good person from my life for very stupid, worthless reasons.
I've been an idiot. For that I'm very sorry.

Wow, I'm really hitting hard on the lack of humor these days, right? Gosh... gotta think of something funny to say.

Knock knock...

Family

Brace yourself... There is no quick wit or funny in this blog posting...

I wholey believe in the importance of family and of keeping them close to your heart. There are times when I become very emotional about my own family because I know how truely blessed I am to have people like that in my life. I know people who have wonderful families who don't give thanks for them, and I know others who have no family and are struggling without them. And of course I know people who do give thanks for the people that they are blessed to have in their lives.

I love talking about my family. They are my core and my happiness. I am the person that I am today because of their influences on me. My dad is my everything. Never have I met such a strong man. I am not a really emotional person, but my dad was my rock growing up. I know I often butted heads, but I always looked to him for approval. And lucky me, he gave it. I am lucky that he supports me in everything I choose to do. I'm a daddy's girl, even though I choose to hold the independent, country girl image. My mom died when I was very young. And not a day goes by that I don't wonder who I would be if she were still around. But God gave me new life in my stepmother. If I butted heads with anybody growing up, it was her the most. But what I didn't understand at the time was that this wasn't her first rodeo, and that she'd already successfully raised 2 daughters of her own. My antics were nothing new to her... I think. I hope. She did an amazing job. I love my parents. They enforced the rules. They made us do our homework. grounded us when we pushed the limits. They made us come in at 5:30 every evening to have a family dinner. Which I never appreciated at the time... But I look at these families who don't live that way and I feel myself becoming sad for them. Because now I would love to be able to sit down with my entire family every night and talk about my day, and listen to theirs.

I was blessed with a whole bunch of sisters. I always wanted a brother. But now my beautiful sisters have men who I look to as brothers. My sisters are my best friends. My baby sister is my soul mate. My half sister is my inspiration. My step sisters are my idols. And their half sisters are just cool. Growing up I pretended that I didnt like any of them. But I think fighting comes naturally for sibling girls. Now I can't imagine my life without them.

My grandparents, my aunts and my uncles and my cousins. There are so many of them. I love them all so much. I laugh when I am with them, and I cry when I have to part with them. My best memories of my entire life revolve around my family.

I am also blessed to be marrying a man who has a large family, a family who is as tightly knit as my own. I will have a mother in law who I adore. A father in law who almost always makes me laugh without even trying. A sister who is also my best friend and the brother that I never had. I will always have somebody there for me.

Whew, I got through that whole thing without even welling up. Okay, without crying. Okay, without bawling my eyes out. But I only welled up a few times... I hope you will give thanks for those you have around you. And that's all the emotion you will get from me on a Tuesday.

My Little Green

Some of you know that we do dog rescue. There is rarely a time when we don't have rescue dogs fostering in our home along with the resident animals.
Quite frequently, the dogs that come through are not housetrained. And since Josh won't cave and give me the wood floor I've always wanted (I guess I can't complain, I mean he did cave about the fence) than I have had to be clever in how I clean up unhousebroken dog messes. Which are almost daily until we manage to house train the furry little suckers. I have spent too much money on papertowels, Resolve carpet cleaner, anti-amonia sprays, brushes, etc. just trying to keep our friggen beige carpet in check.

Let me introduce you to my new best friend, Little Green.

Oh what a handsome little devil he is. I recieved a WalMart gift card for Christmas and I have been slow in using it. Probably because God knew that I needed to hold it until I got the brillient idea to spend it on something that I will actually use rather than something that would get dusty sitting on a shelf or dull sitting in the back of a closet... Which is where most of my things end up. Yikes.

But not Little Green here. He will be put to great use. Oh yes he will. I can't wait to break him out of his box tonight!

Roses, Testicles & Winter.. Oh my!

Don't run away... I was only kidding! No, I wasn't kidding. These are the true subjects of today's musings.

I mean that is the name of the blog, right? So I don't have to feel guilty about not having any one fun subject to jabber on about. I can muse about whatever I choose.

Hey that rhymes.

Red got me flowers to Valentine's day. I love yellow roses. Red or pink roses are so cliche anyways. Even though I told him that we weren't getting each other anything for the day.

Red didn't listen.



And thus I am stuck with these beautiful flowers. Not that I'm complaining. It's certainly not a hardship to be given pretty flowers by a handsome, rugged man, is it.

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Luke has stopped seeing ghosts for the time being. I'm pretty happy about it. Red was away last night and Luke was at the vet's being neutered. I was a little nervous about being alone without my guard dog. But nobody shone spotlights into the door windows (did I mention that happened recently? Twice!) I didn't hear any funky sounds. I never once jumped 10ft into the air after being startled by a noise. Nope, it was quiet (except for the howling wind) and I slept just fine.

And Luke, well... He had his testicles chopped off less than 24 hours ago and this is how he looks this morning.



Just as chipper and Lab happy as he could be. So I can't complain.
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Ole Man Winter is back. And back with vengence. The 1-3" that we were to have gotten turned into 5-6" and still counting. I am missing the pet expo because the roads are so bad. And it takes some bad roads to keep me from a whole expo centered around my favorite subject in the world: Animals.

Anybody feel like shoveling my sidewalks? Anybody? No takers??

Alright, I understand. I'm off to shovel.