Canine 'Tricks'

Yeah, they're not funny.

You hear that, Jake? NOT FUNNY!

Yours truely (ah, me) went running this morning. But it wasn't for exercise. No, and probably my body didn't benefit from my run at all. In fact, I'd be willing to bet you money that I will be coming down with at least a cold in the next few days. My hair was wet. I was in boots. I had no bra on. And I threw the first sweatshirt on that I could find. Oh, and I grabbed a squeak toy at the last minute.

Now, why on earth would emmie go running in the freezing cold morning with wet hair and a squeaky toy you ask?

Because my dog ran away. Thats why. This is the second time in a week. I had the man neutered years ago to stop this behavior. But noooooo....

Its all my fault really. I didnt hook him up. I was too busy focusing on Frankie and making sure she went potty. Jake is Mr Old Reliable. Usually. Not this morning!

Nope, Jake decided that he was going to go trick or treating... without me! So as soon as I discovered he was gone, I muttered some swear words under my breath, followed by a "Not again!". Then I grabbed some stuff and I ran. And I ran. And I screamed out Jake's name. And then I almost plowed over my startled neighbor. It was still dark outside you see, and he was only trying to take the garbage to his dumpster. Then his crazy neighbor lady comes flying around his garage, screaming, sopping wet hair, squeaking a dog toy. Yep. I probably wont be invited to the next neighborhood bonfire.

After rounding more blocks than my shins care to talk about, I bolted back towards home. I grabbed my keys and I slammed my truck into gear. All of the images of Jakes limp body laying on the side of the road floated through my head. You see, even at the mature age of 7, Jake still has no 'traffic sense'. And after jumping a fence at the tender age of 2yo, and escaping for a day, he managed to get himself hit by a car and left for dead. Luckily, my vets own vet tech happened to be driving by and found him, scooped him up and hauled him into the ER. It was a bad time for me. And all that came rushing back.

After 5 minutes of my driving around (still with wet hair. Still in a sweatshirt and not warm pajama pants. And this time, with all the windows down, still screaming) I saw a dark figure standing in the middle of the street. JAKE! I whipped the truck around and gassed towards the shape. But it wasnt Jake. It was the neighbors black lab. But why was he standing in the middle of the road? Because Jake was in the neighboring yard. I skidded to a stop, shooed black dog back out of the road and into his yard, and opened the truck door for the yellow figure hauling ass towards me. Jerk. Why does he scare me like that?

But you know what? Its all good. I managed to punch in right on time for work this morning. I may not look the greatest today. But its okay. Its all good that I'm pale and my hair is a rats nest and I'm wearing an old sweatshirt. Because its Halloween. And I dont have to look good on Halloween. I just have to look scary. And that I do. So I guess I should be thanking Jake for giving me the pale, sick, scary look on such a day. Right?

No! Not right! He scared the crap out of me today! It was waaaaaaaay too early in the morning for a dog induced heart attack! Come on!

Happy Halloween, folks...