I've been given one of the greatest gifts.
A few months back, I went to the ER for pain in my right side. I feared appendicitis or some such. $2000 in medical bills and months of pain and anxiety later and the only results of my visits were laxitives. They thought that I was constipated. The pain persisted and the laxitives did nothing but make me more miserable. A couple of weeks ago, I finally pressed on. I went back to the clinic and saw yet another doctor. No, in fact, she's not even a doctor, but a nurse practitioner. She agreed that it was probably not my digestive tract and probably had more to do with my 'girlie parts'. She ordered pelvic and abdominal ultrasounds and the next day I was told that they had found a 5cm mass next to my right ovary.
It took me about 36 hours to fully absorb that news and get my brain to function clearly again. In the time since I recieved this news, my life has changed. It's amazing how much more I appreciate the little things. I find joy in things that I never had before. I love to read, but in the past week, that time I spend with my book is more precious. Standing outside in the crisp air while I wait for my dogs to do their business and let off some steam. Washing the dishes and folding fresh, clean laundry. Every kiss and embrace from my fiancee means even more than it did before, if that's even possible.
All of this, and I hadn't even known what was happening to my body yet. The only news I was told was that this unknown thing was growing inside my body.
This morning, I had another doc appointment. Up to this point, I was sure that surgery or something else invasive would be the next step. But to my surprise, I was told that it was shrinking. My doctors are not concerned at this point. It will be a waiting game, but my mind is at ease.
I've been given a gift. Not only the gift of good health. But the gift of a clearer mind and a stronger, more acute ability to appreciate my life for what it is. Life is a God given gift. It can be taken from you at any time, so don't take for granted the little things that make up the whole!
3 comments:
How scary for you Em, but I agree, at the same time a gift. Too often we all take life for granted and it's the little things that make up the fabric of our lives. Sometimes we forget how great it feels to just do the things we love and be with the people we love! I know that since my Mom has been diagnosed with cancer, my whole family has become stronger, closer and we cherish those times with each other. Hoping that it all turns out alright for you. Hugs!
Yes, every day is a gift -- I had my scare couple years ago... lumpiness in my breast. All is well today but did inspire me to get off my butt and starting running. Hats off to you for trying to stay fit in Freezing zone like Minnesota! Enjoy your gift!
zenonabike.blogspot.com
Hey! I just took a look at my blog and read your comments to me, so I thought I should come on over and check yours out again! I haven't been here since 2009! Sorry to hear this news, but glad to see that it's not too much to worry about! As you know, I've been through a lot myself and I find it's amazing how your attitude about things changes when you're confronted with something like this! My surgery went well, and since we're sharing, it was a hysterectomy. Tough decision, but worth it! Sometimes it stinks to know I can't have any more babies, but there are definitely benefits!!! Good luck and continued happiness to you!
Still running? I'm just now getting back into it! Yeah for spring!!!!!
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